42 Days Of Holiday Cheer, What Is To Be Done? by Frank Y Pak Agostinelli
For most of us, it is the most wonderful time of the year. From the day after Thanksgiving to January 1st, there is an aura of good feeling that is unmatched. I have no desire to overanalyze the holiday season, its origins, its commercialization, or whatever. Regardless of what one believes in, we can believe in a time of the year when everyone finally does their part not just to get along but to get along well. Most of us are a little kinder, a little gentler, and actually express love for our fellow human beings. We go that extra mile instead of chucking reindeer crap at one another. Even life long Scrooges buckle under the feeling of the holiday season. Black Friday to January 1st. This year, that is only 42 days of holiday cheer. But what about the other 323 days? Why is it we as a country, as a people, can only be lovable for a little bit over a month? What if this holiday spirit most of us look forward to and love lasted 60 days? Ninety days? One hundred and twenty days? What if we treated one another in the manner we display during the holidays all year around?
Societally speaking, we are a pile of reindeer crap. Observe how we treat others. There is so much unwarranted hate displayed today. No one wants to be held accountable for their own actions. Finger pointing is tantamount. For 323 days a year there are those who have a desire to make life miserable for others. Little things bother us to the point of hurting others. People are in a rush to go no where. There is a plethora of nonsense that is unnecessary to touch upon because it is most certainly sickening. Ask yourself, how can we be so selfless for a minute and so selfish for days? It is truly shameful. However, we can collectively do something about it.
It only takes one positive action to get something going. Think about your New Year’s resolution. The one you kept. It took one step at a time. You felt great because you stuck with your resolution. It becomes almost second nature. Why can’t this be applied to our interaction with people? Is it really this difficult? It is easy to place pen to paper but so difficult to master it.
You may be asking yourself, “why is he writing this?” I’m not writing anything you haven’t thought about yourself or observed with your own eyes. At this time of the year when most of the nonsense we endure daily is placed on the back burner, why not give it a try? Make the “holiday spirit” last 365 days instead of 42 days. Change takes time but it is a step in the right direction. Happy Holidays everyone!
AsiansOfMixedRace.com Interview: Marie Lamba
Marie Lamba is driven. She pushed a novel for nearly 10 years to no avail but kept grinding. After writing What I Meant... in three months, she found her agent and her publisher within a year and in July of this year became a published novelist. She is a mother, a wife, and one hell of a writer who loves Swiss chocolate!
AMR.com: What is, What I Meant . . . all about?
ML: First of all, thanks so much, Frank for hosting me here. I’m honored to be a part of the AsiansOfMixedRace.com community! What I Meant… is all about making your voice heard. About fighting for what is right even when no one believes you. Sang Jumnal is 15, and her parents suddenly think she’s a liar, a thief and a bulimic, all because a trusted adult has been stealing food and money, and setting up Sang to take the blame. But who is going to believe a teen?
AMR.com: Was it important for you to have a biracial lead character/heroine?
ML: Definitely. My kids are both half Asian-Indian, half Italian-American, and they are always looking for kids like themselves in the media. But let’s face it, though the world is filled with biracial kids, the world of books, movies, and TV just hasn’t caught up with this. The hot thing for many years has been multicultural literature. But much of it centers around a plot that goes something like this: Oh no! My family is (fill in the ethnic group) and so different from everyone else. How will I ever fit in? While this story is important for some of us, this isn’t the only story that needs to be told. I wanted to show a biracial character in the role of a hero. And as someone who is completely cool with her background and proud of it.
AMR.com: Were any of the characters created after someone in real life, especially chachi?
ML: It is fiction, let me say that right up front. But the dad definitely is similar to my husband. The characters of Sang and Doodles share traits with my daughters. And Chachi? Well, let’s just say I have had the misfortune of meeting someone with some of those qualities…Shiver!
AMR.com: In chapter 45 the family goes to the gurdwara. There is a moment Sang describes about her mother: “People stare at Mom, some even turning to take a closer look. Like they’ve never seen an American before.” Have you ever been in this situation too?
ML: Absolutely. As the only non-Indian sitting in a gurdwara in New Jersey, people do turn and stare. It’s just natural curiosity. They’re probably wondering: what the heck is she doing here? During the times I’ve visited India, the staring and curiosity was magnified. First of all, the whole personal space bubble doesn’t really exist. And in some of the villages we’ve been through, it felt like I was the only American they’d seen. Ever. Sometimes there were crowds of children following me everywhere, which was kind of sweet. During a long bus-ride, there was a woman just inches from my face with her eyes locked on me. I said hi. No reaction. That was pretty uncomfortable.
AMR.com: Can you touch on the issue of your book concerning chain bookstores and how readers can help?
ML: Gladly. Most readers don’t realize what a chokehold Borders and Barnes and Nobles have on the book industry. If the head buyer for each chain store passes on carrying your book, then it does not appear at ANY of them anywhere in the country. Can you imagine how devastating that is to a book’s success? An author can persuade a few of her local chain stores to carry them, but that’s it. This happened to What I Meant…, as it does to many wonderful first-time novels. These big stores are often reluctant to take a risk on a first-time novelist. So what can readers do? The reviews for my book have been excellent. People who have read it have been so responsive to this novel. But still the challenge is to spread the word that this book exists. Special thanks to AsiansOfMixedRace.com for really helping to do just that! Fortunately, readers can really make a difference in what happens to this book. You can order What I Meant… at any bookstore, even the chains, and ask them if they would consider stocking it on their shelves. Definitely try to support those independent bookstores in your neighborhood by purchasing from them. What I Meant… can also be ordered on-line at Barnes & Noble and Amazon. Plus, you could ask your local librarian to consider ordering a copy for their shelves. And if you’ve read my book and liked it, you can tell at least three people about it, post a review on Amazon, and blog about it.
These simple forms of support can transform a book, any book. Keep this in mind whenever you fall in love with a novel that isn’t getting the press that it deserves. It’s all about getting it into the hands of other readers, and letting them fall in love with it too.
AMR.com: You wrote a novel, “In And Out Of Time.” You tried selling it but to no avail. What kept you motivated to continue your dream of writing?
ML: I guess I’m really really stubborn. Plus, I am a writer. If that is who you are, being published or not can’t change that. If I didn’t write, I don’t know what I’d do with myself!
AMR.com: Ramapo High School, your old high school has churned out a couple more published authors. Who are they?
ML: Michael Kun is the author of a number of highly acclaimed novels, which feature his characteristic biting wit. Michael Galluccio authored a memoir about his experiences as a gay man trying to adopt a child. We all graduated together, and they are both really nice people. I am so proud of them both.
AMR.com:At the University of Pennsylvania you were an English major who created a second major: Literary Art. Would you like to incorporate your own drawings in a book one day?
ML: I think so. I feel like art was such a part of me, and I’ve let that part slip away a bit. My sketchbooks have gotten dusty, and my paints have all dried up. My time right now is so devoted to writing and to my children, but as my kids get more independent, I’m hoping to dust off the old sketchbook and see where it takes me.
AMR.com: You spent a semester in England. How influential was your time spent there on your writing?
ML: As an English major you spend so much time reading about the English countryside, and their society. Being there really brought the literature to life for me. And when I visited the British Museum and saw handwritten manuscripts by James Joyce and Jane Austen and so many others, I really felt like these writers were not gods up on some literary cloud, but were real flesh and blood people. They had crappy handwriting, and lots of scratch outs just like me. Maybe I could actually write novels too!
AMR.com: You’re a leader of Senior and Cadette Girl Scouts. Can you talk about your workshop So What’s The Story?
ML: Seniors and Cadettes who want to earn their silver award or their gold award must earn as part of this a total of three interest patches per award. As a leader myself, I saw how hard these can be to earn, sometimes taking several months for just one award. So I’ve come up with a workshop that I present free to the scouts that will let them earn their reading interest patch in just two-hours. The workshop includes a service project, me reading from my book and chatting about writing and how books come to be, and ends with each girl getting her own signed copy of my novel, which they have pre-paid for. I’m doing a bunch of workshops around Pennsylvania, and I’m really looking forward to working with the girls. More info is on my website MarieLamba.com (click on For Scouts).
AMR.com: Who are the Rebel Writers?
ML: A writing group that I’ve formed with a small group of novelists. We have six members, who all started out unpublished, and now we have two members published, another who just got a book deal, and another who just landed a top agent! We meet once a month and critique only two writers per meeting. Folks that we critique submit up to 100 pages the month prior, so we have plenty of time to look a large chunk of the manuscripts over and make edits. It results in great discussion and great friendships. I really encourage anyone interested in writing novels to form their own group.
AMR.com: Who is Marie Lamba?
ML: A mom. A writer. A very silly person. A poodle owner.
AMR.com: Have you always wanted to be a writer and who inspired you to write?
ML: I’ve wanted to write since I was in second grade. That’s when I figured out that reading books was actually fun, and took you to incredible places. Also, in a weird way my parents and brother inspired me. I grew up in a household of fast-talking funny people. I couldn’t talk as fast, and I’d think of funny things to say AFTER they left the room. So writing was a natural way for me to express myself. And they really taught me about timing and humor.
AMR.com: Do you have any advice for anyone who wants to be a writer?
ML: Write. Don’t be discouraged. Always strive to get better and better. But love what you do. And don’t give up. Ever. Remember, the only thing you know for sure in this business is that if you give up, nothing will ever happen. Dreams do happen.
AMR.com: You got your agent and your editor through a conference. How important is attending a conference for writers who have a manuscript to push?
ML: It is great to actually meet these people. If you are genuinely impressed with them or by something they said, then that will come through sincerely in your query letter to them. If you are able to discuss your book with them, and they say, “Send it to me,” then you can mail it with a label on the envelope that says “requested material.” The work has to stand up on its own, of course, but these little ins can get you attention from an agent or editor sooner.
AMR.com: What are you reading now?
ML: I just finished the Stephanie Meyers trilogy. Hot stuff! Right now I’m working on another novel, so I can’t read anything. It confuses me. I do suduko instead.
AMR.com: Who are some of your favorite authors?
ML: T.H. White, Edward Eager, R.K. Narayan, Anne Tyler. I go for wacky and for elegant imagery. Kind of a weird combo.
AMR.com: What do you enjoy doing when you are not writing?
ML: I love watching chick flicks, eating different cuisines, cooking up strange meals, taking long walks, wandering through museums, dreaming of foreign travel…
AMR.com: Is there anything better than Swiss chocolate?
